Today, I allowed Tee to play truant because she faked had a runny nose and a wet cough. Relaxing day for me, I fantasised, since I didn’t have to fight traffic or get off my butt to do the school run. We were invited to go out to Kidzone but believe or not, my Little Missy played angel saint and said she didn’t want to go because she wasn’t feeling well!!! HUH??? [worried]. Was she really so unwell? Or did she crave my attention so much that she wanted to relish in all the one-to-one Mummy time she could get. She didn’t want to get out of the house?! It was certainly a first.
The day started off well. Breakfast. Toys. I cleaned out a small section of the study cupboard. Lunch. Nap. Bath. Started cooking dinner. All was well.
After 5pm however, my patience started wearing thin. Like an onion being peeled, layer by layer, from neverending banter with a chipmunk voice.
Whilst marinating my Eurasian chicken stew, I had to wash my hands like ten times because Little Missy had a request for MAMMMMEEEEEEE every 90 seconds. I know every single Mom of you out there have been through this. You just cannot do anything in peace from start to end. It’s always interrupted. If you like repetition, be a Mom. If you like walking back and forth twenty times whilst undertaking a task, be a Mom. That’s my advice. You will not be disappointed.
The bloody tofu packet that I was trying to peel open, tore the wrong way. Thus I wasn’t able to remove it’s plastic wrapper without ruining the lovely smooth aesthetic of my tofu dish. It’s like those luncheon meat tins with the little keys. Have you ever broke the key off from the cut-out metal piece? You get the picture. I don’t usually sweat over little things like this but I especially wanted to today because I’ve been slacking off in the culinary department. I’m surprised the Hubs hasn’t turned anorexic. And God forbid should my mother-in-law ever read this.
After cooking, I told her I needed some rest so I turned my computer on. She insisted on sitting with me so I turned on the Hub’s laptop and we sat beside each other doing our own thing. Cool. But shortlived. She just had TOO many questions and when you’re trying to concentrate on writing something, it doesn’t help when you keep getting asked why the rat isn’t moving to the cheese or if the gingerbread man should use a mix of triangle or square buttons. OR if the snowman liked eating carrots. FUCK ME RUNNING!!! Do I look like I frigging care???!!!
This wasn’t working. So I lifted the filled to the brim with garbage from my earlier cupboard clear-out paper bag and headed to the kitchen to bring out dinner.
CRASH!!! Old magazines, scraps of paper, dirty tissues, more paper and magazines fell through the BOOKBINDER’s paper bag. I thought they were supposed to make strong paper bags. Nevermind.
“What happened?” Little Missy runs up and when she sees mayhem, goes, “Ohhhh……” and looks at me with a blank. Then watches me pick every single piece of trash up.
Now usually, we have dinner at the dining table and she feeds herself but today, I allowed her to paint during dinner because I had an ulterior motive. I craved a secret meeting with my best friend, the internet. The intention was to feed her whilst she painted and I rendezvoused while she chewed. In between, I’d be reminding her to please chew her food.
“Chew your food! Have you swallowed you food?”
“Chew your food! Just swallow it.”
“Hurry up. Chew your food.”
“Please chew your food, Tee…..use your teeth.”
Yup. Repeat 500 times. Repetition, like I said earlier. It’s ALL…….about repetition.
Then,
“HAAAAAAATCHOOOOOOOO………!!!!!!!!!!!!!”
Minced pieces of food flew out onto my computer, my table, both my fat thighs, my fabric chair, the floor. [This is exactly why you should never keep food in your mouth].
Silence.
“Don’t move!” I yelled and ran to grab a rag. Whilst picking up every morsel, I asked her what had just happened, surprised that she hadn’t yet apologised for her accident. She said she sneezed. AND???
“And so you just pick evewything up.” she replied, as a matter of factly, like I was the maid. Perhaps she was in shock for the lack of apology so I gave her the benefit of doubt.
Patting myself on the back real hard for not throwing a fit, I told her that I wanted to be left alone. Do your painting, I’ll type. We don’t talk. Capiche?!?
Does she not talk? Are you crazy??? She decided that she wanted to do some glitter painting, then she needed her scissors, then some stickers, then the shaped hole punchers, then her stamp pad, AND the sparkly pens. [Grrr…..]. After lots of bartering with waves of irritation seeping into my tone, we finally sort her out with some glitter tubes. Five minutes later,
SPLASH…….!!!
Dirty blue paint water runs all along the plastic floor mat (for painting) and finds its way onto my timber floor. Before I could even react, her eyes darted to me and I swear I saw her body shiver and quiver. Quick as light,
“I’m sorry, Mummy!!”
I took a deep breath and counted to ten. My face must have looked like death when I went to get another rag. Very calm. Wiped it all up without a word when Tee said pitifully,
“Mummy? I don’t like to be a kid.”
I laughed out loud and hugged her. I reassured her that adults have accidents too, not only kids! Awww……my little girl doesn’t like being a kid!!! Poor thing!!!
Still. I need a tequila.
**************************************************************************Who is Mamapumpkin?
Mamapumpkin is a former Design Architect turned Multi-Million Dollar Digital Entrepreneur. She sets out to prove to all that you can have anything and everything that you want; if you have that fire of desire burning within and the drive to work hard. Even better with much love.
Mamapumpkin has not only grown corporate businesses successfully in the past and doubled her salary 5 times over 5 organisations but has grown THREE BUSINESSES to 7 FIGURES within an 8 year period. She now shows others EXACTLY HOW after retiring her own husband from employment. He is now the official dog walker, family driver, chef and THE BEST FATHER to their two girls and THE BEST HUSBAND to the woman who CHOSE HIM!
Mamapumpkin is the girl who has nothing but fights for everything including YOU. She is idealistic in her desire to put unbelievable amounts of money and extrardinary happiness into the lives of good people so we can change the world together believing in happiness for ALL. She strives to impact lives authentically wanting to reduce poverty cycles and enable quality education for all and always supports the voiceless. She believes we can all have a life of our own desires to enable real contribution into the world. But first, one needs to understand what this all means.
A beautiful life without limits.
If you wish to learn how to propel your life forward guaranteed, be brave to take action. Mamapumpkin's purpose is to build people. Her gift is to help them UNCOVER their HIDDEN GIFTS. She operates fairly and always leaves an impression. You either love her or not and she is alright either way.
She is a living testimony that women really can have a lot. Being financially and time free has enabled her to travel the world anytime, anywhere, doing anything with anyone, as she spends most of her days with her children, having fun, supporting others wherever she can. Also having fun.
