xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx

OK- don’t panic. I’m still very here. It kind of crossed my mind today in passing because if you went through what I did today, you’d honestly have stabbed yourself ten times over without hesitation. It was a CRAZY day. Perhaps it was just hormones and I am super MEGA pre-menstrual. Poor Tee.

The plan for the day was playgroup at a school mate’s home (she came in very late this term, so it was nice to be friendly and I graciously accepted her invitation), music class (free trial) and baby yoga (great class for Tee). That was already too much. I seriously need to remind myself – ONE activity per day is all we can handle; but what’s the point of reminding myself when my memory’s rubbish?!

I had to meet up with a friend in Bangsar first to show her directions to the said playgroup’s house, bright and early. I gave her a wake up call. And then we agreed to call each other once we were ready to leave our homes. When I was ready, I tried calling but the phone was engaged. Tried and tried and tried. Got a little irritated but decided to stay calm and just wait for another 10 minutes before leaving by myself. Then I got her message saying she was already on the way. I jumped out of my skin and rushed Tee down to the parking lot before zooming off to our meeting point in Bangsar. Arrived and she hadn’t. Waited again.

Arrived finally at playgroup with a splitting headache, possibly from stress that I had a busy day ahead. No, I don’t know why I was stressed. I just was. Everyone irritated me today. Including myself. The playgroup started at 9.30am – we arrived at 11.15am. That fucking irritated me. Music class was at 12pm – I had a headache, I was in a  foul mood, Tee was whining that she didn’t want to go for the music class; so I cancelled. Besides, it would have been so rude to arrive and leave in a flash.

The playgroup was full of noise and screaming kids – the perfect remedy for my headache. When we left, Tee was offered a chocolate cookie. When we got into the car, I flashed sirens that she was NOT to touch any part of the car’s insides. My new car’s insides. My new car’s LIGHT coloured insides. Of course, I knew that was impossible, but I don’t know, I was possessed. Then the lady I came with’s little girl wanted a cookie too so I got her a cookie that I had in my bag. Then Tee changed her mind and wanted THAT cookie. Stressed about Tee not touching car with chocolate coated hands, digging for new cookie for friend, hearing whines about wanting new cookie, manouvering child into car seat in parking lot with a million and one things in my hands, I could feel blood pulsing out of my ears.

In my mind, I was thinking, if I said anything to Tee to piss her off (like NOT have THAT cookie), the chocolate hands on my car seats would be an automatic response. So I remained calm. When I finally cleaned her hands, strapped her in and gave her new cookie warning her again to not leave crumbs everywhere, I noticed that she had her shoes on my car head rest. I have told her countless of times not to put her legs, especially with shoes, on my head rest. So again today, I reminded her in not my friendliest tone. True to Tee’s character, she purposely lifted her feet up and put them on my head rest again when a hard smack with full force came down on her shin. With a smug face, she kicked my head rest when another full force smack came down on the other shin. It was painful as she started rubbing her shins. I wasn’t proud of myself but man, I’d lost it. There was so much all morning already, I haven’t even told you how Tee wanted to leave the playgroup, then changed her mind, then changed her mind again…….

Today, I just wanted to be alone. I didn’t want to hear any tiny voices, I didn’t want to deal with any demands and I certainly didn’t want further irritation from adults. But that is exactly what I got.

We went to our favourite pancake place for lunch (not Paddington’s although I don’t mind them), and my irritation escalated. Their new Ozzie chef was rude, obnoxious and totally unsexy. Of course, we found out later that he was on his last days with them since starting a month ago. I complained about the pancakes which felt like rubber and tasted like stale lemon. He cooked me a fresh one, which still tasted bad. The owners got me the one I wanted and that was the only happy thing that happened today.

When the owners had left, the chef came to my table to ask my daughter if her mother was always whinging at home. The gall!!! So I joked, yeah….my husband has the same complaint. And he reiterated, so you’re always complaining, eh? Are you a bored housewife? Fuck man! Just because he has been terminated, he had to take it out on me la!

I was so irritated with him that I had to tell him I was an architect because I just couldn’t say I was a ‘housewife’ to this arsehole. So he asked, is that because you studied to be a draughtsman? WHAT??!!! The mother fucker, what do I owe him to prove I have a degree, unlike his Ozzie bum friends who proclaim more glamorous professions when all they really know are surfing waves and picking up sarong party girls?! To cut our sarcastic banter short, he said it was the MALAYSIAN flour that made his pancakes taste the way they did, hated everything about Malaysia, especially the cheap pay, blablabla…..so I said what the hell are you doing here then? He said oh, I’m leaving in a week. Where’re you going? Another French restaurant in KL. Huh? You hate Malaysia but you’re still gonna work here? Then he changed the story and said oh, soon he’s going to Singapore, they pay much better. Well, I’ll spare you the rest of our sparring session but I left the restaurant with the belief that many matsallehs are here because they’re so rubbish that they’ve been kicked out of their own home country! Fuck, I’ve never met someone I couldn’t stand more since high school. That guy hasn’t been fucked since high school too. Grrrr…..

Oh, oh and guess what? He was so dissatisfied that he had to pick a fight with Tee too. First, he told her that her fish fingers were made out of his own fingers (he had a bandaged finger) and kept showing her that what she was eating was really his bandaged fingers all mashed up. Then he told her that rice and potatoes were all unhealthy as they were all starch and sugar. Of course, Tee kept protesting…..No! That is rice, not sugar! No! That is a potato! It’s not sugar! That is fish! Not your finger! You are twicking me! That is NOT sugar! And she kept looking at him as though he was an idiot, I tell ya, my daughter’s pretty sharp. He also started going all technical on her with bigger words so she couldn’t understand, trying to explain why HE was right about rice being sugar etc. PUHLEEEEZE…..!!! I was so tickled with Tee’s innocence, I didn’t butt in and just allowed their little disagreement to continue. All I could think was, cannot win adult must pick on child la….aiyo……

So in the meantime, I was also irritated with the chair, the knife, the walls, the hair of Moms in front of me…….etc. One mom said she was school visiting with her husband an international school, a Chinese school and a local private school in deciding their child’s education. I told her they were three extremely different educational approaches and asked if they had decided which approach they wanted first before seeing the schools. She said they were deciding based on the facility. Huh? Gold toilet seat – tick, hole in the ground – cross. Huh? OK whatever…….poor child.

And then another Mom who gives the earth, sun, moon and planets included, to her child on demand, refuses to see that she is at a big risk of a turnaround at later life; told her best friend (or one of, I’m not sure how close they are) that she no longer wanted to see her, when her ‘best friend’ advised her once, twice, thrice to not spoil and protect her child to sickeningly gross degrees as there would be repercussions and that she would not be telling her the same thing again yet in forty years time, the ‘best friend’ would be there for the ‘mother who gets strung around her child’s fingers and gets trampled over like shit’ to listen to her hurt and silent cries and will not say I TOLD YOU SO. I thought she was being an amazing friend. I certainly want people to tell me if they truly cared about me but I guess some people want to remain blinded and so in retaliation choose to turn what could be their best friendship away. Honestly, I was secretly glad that the ‘best friend’ thought along the same lines as myself and extremely shocked and sad that our friend felt the way she did.

THEN……………..we went for baby yoga and Tee was totally uncooperative. I exaggerate. She was just being a toddler, following some moves and wandering off at other times. Usually, I am normal and couldn’t care less what she does in class but today, since I had a couple of cucumbers already jammed up my anus, I was being bloody anal with Tee. I kept irritatingly scolding her to PAY ATTENTION and listen to the teacher when the poor girl was already exhausted from the day’s events. She would complain that the yoga class was too long and she was already so tired (if you knew Tee, you’d know that she NEVER says she is tired, even when she’s already asleep, her mouth can still mumble “I am not tired”)……..she would do things repeatedly when the teacher clearly instructed the class to do ONLY ONCE……..she would just generally go against the tide. And today, this fucking PISSED ME OFF.

We finally got home, showered and she got sent off to bed without dinner. Cruel? My rationale, she didn’t finish lunch and didn’t want to eat what was served. Tough. All I wanted was peace. I’d already endured 9 hours of head explosions, all I wanted was silence. Real silence. And of COURSE, I didn’t get that.

She couldn’t sleep because her Daddy wasn’t home and she was starving and she really needed to see her Daddy, and if she starved some more, she’d disappear into thin air. WAH!!! I want MY DADDY!!!! After an hour of trying to put her to bed (despite complaining how tired she was earlier), I gave up and called the Hubs. He came home, I handed her over and after she went to sleep, I cried. I cried a bucket of tears when the Hubs said I was full of crazy hormones.

Then he told me to stop hanging out with mothers.

Huh?

**************************************************************************
Who is Mamapumpkin?
Mamapumpkin is a former Design Architect turned Multi-Million Dollar Digital Entrepreneur. She sets out to prove to all that you can have anything and everything that you want; if you have that fire of desire burning within and the drive to work hard. Even better with much love.

Mamapumpkin has not only grown corporate businesses successfully in the past and doubled her salary 5 times over 5 organisations but has grown THREE BUSINESSES to 7 FIGURES within an 8 year period. She now shows others EXACTLY HOW after retiring her own husband from employment. He is now the official dog walker, family driver, chef and THE BEST FATHER to their two girls and THE BEST HUSBAND to the woman who CHOSE HIM!

Mamapumpkin is the girl who has nothing but fights for everything including YOU. She is idealistic in her desire to put unbelievable amounts of money and extrardinary happiness into the lives of good people so we can change the world together believing in happiness for ALL. She strives to impact lives authentically wanting to reduce poverty cycles and enable quality education for all and always supports the voiceless. She believes we can all have a life of our own desires to enable real contribution into the world. But first, one needs to understand what this all means.

A beautiful life without limits.

If you wish to learn how to propel your life forward guaranteed, be brave to take action. Mamapumpkin's purpose is to build people. Her gift is to help them UNCOVER their HIDDEN GIFTS. She operates fairly and always leaves an impression. You either love her or not and she is alright either way.

She is a living testimony that women really can have a lot. Being financially and time free has enabled her to travel the world anytime, anywhere, doing anything with anyone, as she spends most of her days with her children, having fun, supporting others wherever she can. Also having fun.