I am a lazy parent. I admit it. What is a lazy parent? Well, a lazy parent is one who is lazy. You can be lazy in correcting your child, you can be lazy in physically getting up to go get things and instead use your little assistants to go get them for you instead (MAJOR GUILT), you can be lazy in feeding them, you can be lazy in teaching them, you can be lazy in putting them to sleep (so they stay up till they conk out themselves and lack sleep as a result, and then suffer the knock-on effects), you can be lazy in keeping them clean; and the list goes on. I am lazy in more ways than one. Parenting was never my thing. Wearing a Chanel suit is.

But now that I’m riding the parenting wave, I’m learning better how to balance my parenting wake board; and after 7 years of practising, I’ve learnt a few tricks amongst others.

One of it is kids NOT listening to you. Or kids having SELECTIVE hearing. Do you have kids who listen all the time? Do you have kids who do as you say after first instruction? Nah, not me either.

This is my take on it. Unless your kid is between the ages of 6-24 months (which is the age of the unknown to the age of pushing boundaries), technically speaking, if you taught your kids to actually listen to you, they should. And if they don’t, it is highly likely that you are guilty of some degree of lazy parenting.

I know I certainly am. Take heed those of you who still have a chance at this with young toddlers.

Interestingly, I have an almost 7 year old, who listens to me as and when she chooses (and when she doesn’t, I throw a flying fit! – so unnecessary) and an almost 2 year old who does not listen at all.

My 7 year old is already an effect of lazy parenting (of which I’m desperately trying to rectify now, but probably too late) and my 2 year old is about to embark on a journey of SOLID (unlazy) parenting.

With T1, I was rather inconsistent with instructions and reproval, thus sending mixed messages. I would reprimand her for something negative at times when it was convenient to me, and not reprimand her when it wasn’t convenient to me. With this kind of parenting, the child learns to take advantage of your stand. For example, interrupting me when I’m talking is a no-no. But sometimes, I will attend to her first and let her rush off so I can quickly get back to my conversation but sometimes, I would stop my conversation, remind her that she has to WAIT her turn, and make her WAIT, or tell her to come back later. She always makes the excuse that if she comes back later or WAIT, she would have forgotten what she needed to say so I tell her to write it down! Besides, if she could forget it, then perhaps it wasn’t SO important!

But seriously, this thing of sometimes Mommy will scold me for not doing something and sometimes she doesn’t for the same something, what does it teach a child? My rule now is that whenever I tell her to do something, that she is to do it IMMEDIATELY. I truly have not the energy to keep calling and calling.

So. When it comes to T2,  I used to use the 1-2-3 method but that started losing effect after awhile. I’d tell her NOT to stand on the couch and she’d just look at me and smile. Then I’d threaten her, 1-2-3 and she’d quickly sit on the count of 3. But the moment I turn my back, she’s up standing again and I have to repeat my 1-2-3. And all this while, she’s got this darn cheeky grin on her little face, testing my patience and pushing her boundaries.

Now, I tell her NOT to stand on the couch ONCE. When she disobeys (and she ALWAYS does), I tell her one more time in a really stern tone of voice, after which she will either be LIFTED OFF the couch (and you see, this takes effort, but it must be done) and put into the cot, or she will quickly sit down begging for mercy when I walk towards her. The cot is our punishment naughty corner. She does not sleep in it.

We are working towards Mommy giving her an instruction once, and her following it IMMEDIATELY. For both girls.

I don’t own a cane but damn, sometimes I wish I did!

 

 

**************************************************************************
Who is Mamapumpkin?
Mamapumpkin is a former Design Architect turned Multi-Million Dollar Digital Entrepreneur. She sets out to prove to all that you can have anything and everything that you want; if you have that fire of desire burning within and the drive to work hard. Even better with much love.

Mamapumpkin has not only grown corporate businesses successfully in the past and doubled her salary 5 times over 5 organisations but has grown THREE BUSINESSES to 7 FIGURES within an 8 year period. She now shows others EXACTLY HOW after retiring her own husband from employment. He is now the official dog walker, family driver, chef and THE BEST FATHER to their two girls and THE BEST HUSBAND to the woman who CHOSE HIM!

Mamapumpkin is the girl who has nothing but fights for everything including YOU. She is idealistic in her desire to put unbelievable amounts of money and extrardinary happiness into the lives of good people so we can change the world together believing in happiness for ALL. She strives to impact lives authentically wanting to reduce poverty cycles and enable quality education for all and always supports the voiceless. She believes we can all have a life of our own desires to enable real contribution into the world. But first, one needs to understand what this all means.

A beautiful life without limits.

If you wish to learn how to propel your life forward guaranteed, be brave to take action. Mamapumpkin's purpose is to build people. Her gift is to help them UNCOVER their HIDDEN GIFTS. She operates fairly and always leaves an impression. You either love her or not and she is alright either way.

She is a living testimony that women really can have a lot. Being financially and time free has enabled her to travel the world anytime, anywhere, doing anything with anyone, as she spends most of her days with her children, having fun, supporting others wherever she can. Also having fun.