We are all too familiar with the platitude, it won’t happen to me.
What are the chances that I would strike a lottery in my lifetime or break a leg whilst skiing or lose an uncle in an unfortunate car crash? Many of us take for granted that it just won’t happen to me but in real life, these are all things that CAN happen.
Really.
And the more mentally prepared one is the better one is able to cope with such circumstance, although pain is indeed inevitable.
I have cancer. That was the sms text message I received from my mother one morning 5 years ago.
So many people in this world have cancer and you hear about people having cancer in your day to day life, yet it hits you like….. a ton of bricks…….. when you suddenly realize that your own mother has cancer. Worst when she hasn’t even lived to half a century old. The effects are tenfold when you realize what kind of relationship me and my mom have always had.
I locked my office room door and cried to myself for a whole 20 minutes before I plucked up the courage to call her. I picked up the phone and as composed as I forced myself to be, I could feel my voice start to stutter. In the end, mom ended up laughing and me crying. So wonderfully positive and strong, my mother.
Adenoid Cystic Carcinoma. Mom made a joke that of ALL the types of cancer to have, she had to get one that was rare and untreatable.
“What does that mean?” I asked really wanting to know what impact this had on her life and indirectly mine.
The cancer was at a late Stage 2 and the Doctor could not say how long she had. The first thing I did after that phone call was send out a few more sms-es to my closest friends about the news, really for them to share my shock and sadness. I then did an internet search on the particular cancer.
Apparently a slow growing cancer, it only spreads actively when it decides to have a spurt. It is not treatable with chemotherapy or radiotherapy and the only thing that can be done is to remove the tumour through operation. At that point, they wanted my mother to remove her whole tongue. She said forget it. As much as we tried to convince her that her mind was worth more than not being able to talk, she said no.
Subsequently, she saw many Doctors and sought medical and non-medical advice from all over the world. I myself traveled miles to this supposed ‘miracle’ church which was a dilapidated attap roof makeshift holy house hidden away in some suburb. There I wrote on a piece of paper:
“Please God let mom live another 10 years” and dropped it into the miracle box. Lit some candles and made my journey home.
Mom’s had 2 operations so far and Doctors don’t recommend a third as it would aggravate the cancer. She survives on a cocktail of painkillers which help the pain but doesn’t alleviate it completely. She eats limited food due to the pain in half her mouth/throat area. She is sometimes irritable and moody. But she is alive. And she is around to play with my daughter. That alone makes me so grateful. I am so grateful for the last 5 years that I had with my mother.
**************************************************************************Who is Mamapumpkin?
Mamapumpkin is a former Design Architect turned Multi-Million Dollar Digital Entrepreneur. She sets out to prove to all that you can have anything and everything that you want; if you have that fire of desire burning within and the drive to work hard. Even better with much love.
Mamapumpkin has not only grown corporate businesses successfully in the past and doubled her salary 5 times over 5 organisations but has grown THREE BUSINESSES to 7 FIGURES within an 8 year period. She now shows others EXACTLY HOW after retiring her own husband from employment. He is now the official dog walker, family driver, chef and THE BEST FATHER to their two girls and THE BEST HUSBAND to the woman who CHOSE HIM!
Mamapumpkin is the girl who has nothing but fights for everything including YOU. She is idealistic in her desire to put unbelievable amounts of money and extrardinary happiness into the lives of good people so we can change the world together believing in happiness for ALL. She strives to impact lives authentically wanting to reduce poverty cycles and enable quality education for all and always supports the voiceless. She believes we can all have a life of our own desires to enable real contribution into the world. But first, one needs to understand what this all means.
A beautiful life without limits.
If you wish to learn how to propel your life forward guaranteed, be brave to take action. Mamapumpkin's purpose is to build people. Her gift is to help them UNCOVER their HIDDEN GIFTS. She operates fairly and always leaves an impression. You either love her or not and she is alright either way.
She is a living testimony that women really can have a lot. Being financially and time free has enabled her to travel the world anytime, anywhere, doing anything with anyone, as she spends most of her days with her children, having fun, supporting others wherever she can. Also having fun.
Boy, can I relate to what you’re going through. Your words are beautiful — keep recording them.
Whenever you write about your mother, she always come across as a generous and selfless person. A beautiful soul. From her hard beginnings when she gave birth to you (as mentioned in an old post), to her trumping the odds in her life, I can’t help but cheer for her… And I always think 1 day, if ever I were to bump into her (if I can recognise her from your blog pics), it is my wish to tell her this… “You may not know me but your daughter has written such beautiful things about you… As beautiful as it is, I believe none can capture the essence of you… I heard you are in pain… And my prayers are with you… Whatever lies ahead, I wish you peace and love…”.