Mom reared her ugly head this morning and screamed at me, Tok-Tok, and the nurses. Errr….basically, she screamed at everyone in sight. The woman is a cancer sufferer. She survives on a diet of ice-cream, yogurt and fresh juices because she cannot really chew food, but she must eat because she takes some lethal doses of cancer medication daily that eats into her stomach lining.
When we were in our last days in Australia, she’d started bleeding and of course, didn’t want to alarm us thus kept quiet about it. We came home, rested for a few days and then she dropped the bomb that she’d been bleeding. The day she saw the doctor, she was admitted immediately because we have a family history of colon cancer. The earliest age statistically for colon cancer is around 50 but my aunt had it a few years earlier. Not a good sign.
The Doctor needed Mom’s bowels to be cleaned out pristinely before an endoscopy procedure but after more than 50 hours of giving her enemas and not allowing her to eat, she went ballistic. I can imagine why. You try not eating for 50 hours and come back to report what happens. What more, her body that is used to sugar, went into shock. They kept giving her a particular medicine to clear her bowels and she kept telling them that her body didn’t agree with the meds because she not only got terribly nauseous (don’t forget, she already has a cocktail of meds for her tongue cancer that was now being taken on an empty stomach) but developed a migraine, felt dizzy and would pass out each time she poured it over herself. After 2 attempts and 2 days of that particular med, the Doctor agreed to top it up with a different medicine although he said the new one wasn’t as effective. To cut a long story short, mom went ballistic because she was starving, feeling really sick and they were not guaranteeing her when this ordeal was ending.
I spoke to the Doctor over the phone, since it was a Sunday, and he finally said that most patients were able to clear their bowels within 3-4 hours but Mom wasn’t, so there was certainly something lurking inside. Her blood results were not all clear (haemoglobin levels low, bacteria in urine, extremely high cholesterol etc) but it was inconclusive to confirm colon cancer till the endoscopy was done. What a dilemma. The Doctor had this sense of urgency to do the scope but the patient’s bowel was not clearing.
Finally, mom said, even if she DID have colon cancer, so what? She wasn’t going to undergo chemotherapy. No way. She already was suffering from another type of cancer, and Doctors have already said there was nothing else they could do with that cancer, why bother? I can only imagine how she felt. It was a double whammy she truly did not deserve.
She demanded to be discharged and so I had to sign a form to say I’d be responsible for her because she was discharging herself against Doctor’s orders. That was scary. She had 20 hours more to go of starvation but she couldn’t heck it. She wanted out. I tried coaxing her to perhaps drink 3 litres of water but it wasn’t working. *BIG SIGH* Later, Tok-Tok tried and got yelled at too. Looks like we know who is boss around here! We’re dealing with a woman who’s suffering from extreme hunger and severe withdrawal symptoms to add on to irritation with inexperienced nurses who poked her till she bled, and a Doctor who failed to interview his patient thoroughly. He didn’t even contact her first cancer doctor (who is in the same building), can you imagine? It must be hospital politics!
So we got discharged but the nurses were so busy with ten thousand things plus a handbag was stolen from the ward (can you believe it? When we got admitted, we were warned that we were to never leave our belongings in the room and I suspected theft was an occurrence and on this very morning, it had happened again to another poor patient! Who in their right mind would be so cruel as to take advantage of helpless patients? Malaysia, truly amazing…..) thus getting the bill prepared took forever. We brought mom some food which she downed in 10 seconds flat then waited and waited and waited. 3 hours later, I chased them and we eventually got to pay the bill on the discharge floor. Then they told us we had to go back to the ward to collect her medication. WTF. But when we went back up to the ward, the medication wasn’t ready. So we decided to load the car up first, then come back for the meds. The nurses said 5 minutes. We went to the parking lot, loaded the car and drove it out. 15 minutes later, we went back to the ward and mom was confronted with a huge bag of medication that could’ve lasted her her entire life.
She asked the nurses what the hell they were, so they checked and it turns out it was a wrong prescription. What if they hadn’t checked? Mom would have been blindly consuming God only knows what! So they made calls to the pharmacist downstairs and then ding-dong-ding-dong, nurses and pharmacist had an argument about which meds were for which patient la-di-da-di-da……..by which time, Mom got so fed up, yelled at them to get their act together and walked out.
Nobody dared say anything. Tok-Tok, me and my brother…..all terrified. We just brought her home and pandered to her every command, but the Doctor has warned us that she needs to get back in. What do you do with a hot-headed Eurasian woman? Let’s hope she settles down, eats well and prepares herself mentally for what is to come because she really needs to be back in hospital.
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your poor mom! her photo really made my heart sank. totally different from her usual self. on her stubborness, i don’t blame her. after all, she’s right, she has already been through so much and now, she’s being deprived for the last 50 hours of any food. but i know you all are worried of her condition. not sure if it’s a good idea, perhaps get the involvement of t1 to coax nana? don’t think nana will shout at her. but seeing her nana like that may worry her more.
you all take care and will be praying for your mom!
oh dear.. i only know abt yr mom now, I’ve been away for a few days. She’s in pain and she needs love and comfort and the hospital is not giving her any. i really dunno what to say. if it was me in your shoes now, i’ll just keep hugging her..
I’ll pray for her tonight and everyday. pray less pain and suffering for her and pray her colon is clear.
hugs Patsy !
Patsy.. reading this post.. sort of “motivates” me to go pangsai now.. hey, im not laughing, this is not a joke i am writing.. its like this.. i have piles and sometimes it bleeds and at times it doesnt… and sometimes the shit just doesnt come out and it worries me..now reading this.. kind of pushing me to go toilet again..to clear out!
And now I want to say I am so sorry to hear bout your mum,..my own brother is suffering from cancer too..he has underwent 18 chemo and tomorrow again, going to pg for Radiotherapy for the 23rd time.. another 2 times, doc told him to rest… he has gone down more than 7kg.. it is very sad to see our loved ones suffering and we cannot do much to help him, only to obey what they want us to do.. to make them feel better.. my poor mum is taking care of him and she worries a lot.. who doesnt when it happens to our own kids..
above all these, we can also pray..pray and pray… for God’s mercy and healing…
Oh dear.. I’m so sorry. And to see her looking so weak.. you’ve always posted pictures of her looking vibrant and utterly gorgeous. Sigh! It must have been so so difficult for you these past few days. Be strong my dear. Be strong for her too. We’re here for you.
Oh dear… your poor mom! She looked so worn out in that photo… I can imagine going without food for 50 freaking hours! I can’t last 5 hours without food!
An aunt (uncle’s wife) of mine was recently diagnosed with cancer too and she is at the last stage… 🙁 It was devastating as no one ever thought this will come. Her family has a history of congenital heart disease and two of brothers and a sister died because of that illness (died young some more!). She was spared but the Big C came instead.
Oh yeah, send my warmest regards to your mom! She is one strong lady!
Sorry to hear about your mum. I was just speaking to your dentist last weekend, and he commented how tough your mum is. If there is anything I can do really, please call me!
Pls shoot that DOCTOR down. He is not being professional at all. He should have at least gone thru her history, her charts, what can or cannot take…..stupid la. Do you have other doctors or hospital in mind? I guess time for u to visit the Seremban church again?
Anyway do google for LingZhi, Ganoderma. Its a type of food and can be taken together with western medicine. This “food” is really a miracle food. It will lessen the pain. It also pumps oxygen and balance up the white n red blood cells.
I wish I can be with in times like this…. Take care..
Patsy, Hugs & will pray for your mum. I cant imagine how difficult it must be for all of u.
Sending you lots of positive vibes and love, girlfriend.
I hope she gets better, and at moment like this she needs you all more than before, that counts most.
I’ve been through this, “camping” at the hospital on most nights when my mom was admitted for surgery and thereafter chemo side effects. Stay strong and positive and hope nana gets better..
Ai..this brings memories. My Grandpa died from colon cancer, my aunt (his daughter) has it as well. She carries a bag with her everywhere she goes.
It must be so damn frustrating for your mom, but just be with your mom. She might not say it, she might even scream more, but deep down, she sure appreciates your gesture of love. Take care woman..
so sorry to hear about your mom. the photo of her lying on the hospital bed is heartbreaking. the staff at the hospital are really morons. can’t believe they can dispense the wrong medication. hugs to you and your mom. take care..
Sorry to hear about your mom.
Can understand why she shouted at everyone…the starvation, the unprofessional staff at the hospital, the emotions that is churning within her…I am sure she is pretty scared inside but dare not show her fear – anger and frustration is easier, I guessed.
Hope your mom’s colon get a clean bill of health.
Eh…how come meeds also can be mixed up? What if your mom dandy query? What hospital is this??
Wishing you and your family all the best.
My mom had to undergo an operation and I can still remember how it feels like to have a loved one admitted.
poor her. I hope she will get stronger and well soon after the medication they are feeding her with.
That’s so terrible, this makes me feel greatfull that my mum is still alive, although she is suffering from arthritis, and high blood pressure, this made my problems seem so much insignificant! I wish you all the best and please keep a positive attitude.