The following is T1’s English writing at school – Year 3 British/International Syllabus. She has written it entirely herself.
Set – Living Room
Daniel: What’s for dinner?
Mum: Chicken Chops and Lemon Drops!
Daniel: Lemon drops, what’s that? Where are we going to have it?
Mum and Dad: Lemon drop is lemon sauce!
Dad: Mum is cooking…..
Mum: Who said I’m……
Dad: I said.
Mum: But….but……
Dad: Yup, I know. We don’t….Aaaachoooo (sniffing)….have the ingredients. Mum, could you buy it?
Mum: Yes
Daniel: Can I follow Mum out?
Dad: No!
Daniel: Why not?
Dad: That’s because you have not finished your homework! You better be finished before Mum comes back.
Daniel: (Big Sigh). (After he finishes his homework, Mum is still not back). Ahhh…..when is Mum coming back?
At exactly the same time he said that, Mum was saying,
Mum: When am I going to get home?
As Daniel walked to the door to check, his Mum just came in.
Mum: Got the ingredients!
After a few minutes,
Dad and Daniel: Mmmmm…….!!! What’s that smell???
Mum: Dad! Help me cook the lemon drop please.
Daniel: Oh ya! That smell’s the chops!
Mum and Dad: Hungry Daniel???
Daniel: Yup!
Mum and Dad: Well, your stomach’s just in time.
Daniel: And both of you are just in time!
All of them gave a High 5 to each other.
THE END
I think it’s great that she has a storyline with a start, body and ending. I don’t like the slangs but I suppose in a conversation such as this, it is permissible. However, she is half way behind in what she is actually supposed to be doing but if the teacher’s aren’t complaining, I shouldn’t hold my breathe. Right?
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For her year, she is supposed to be able to do the following:-
Use descriptive language to establish a specific setting in writing
– Use adjectives and adverbs selectively to add detail, choosing the most appropriate
– Develop character in more detail in narrative writing
– Create characters in writing using action, description and dialogue
– Edit and improve word choices, considering the audience and purpose
– Use adventurous vocabulary (including figurative language) to describe the setting, mood and characters in narrative writing
– Edit and improve elements of writing, appropriate to a consistent style and viewpoint
– Use a range of adjectives, adverbs, powerful verbs and phrases selectively in order to amuse, entertain, persuade and inform the reader
– Evaluate writing against success criteria and make changes considering the audience and purpose
– Establish and demonstrate a consistent viewpoint in different forms of writing
– Use precise vocabulary (including figurative language) and sentence variation to contribute to the effectiveness of the writing
– Use varied vocabulary to create effects appropriate to the form and purpose of the writing.
– Maintain style (e.g. impersonal, formal) throughout the piece of writing
– Create paragraphs to link and group information
– Consider beginnings of paragraphs and begin use of connectives to help structure text
– Use adverbs and conjunctions to build links between sentences within paragraphs
– Organise writing into different sections, considering the purpose and audience
– Organise ideas into clear sections/ paragraphs with an appropriate opening and closing
– Use connecting words and phrases to give order and structure to writing
– Use connecting words and phrases within and between paragraphs to organise writing in different text types
– Use paragraphs and sections to organise the content and support the purpose of writing in different text types
– Organise writing to include a clear opening and closing and develop material in each section/ paragraph
– Use adjectives and adverbs to create variety and add interest for the reader
– Compose a complex sentence, using a subordinate clause
– Begin to use commas to separate phrases and clauses in sentences
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Sounds damn scary to me!!! T1 has never attended any English enrichment classes yet I view English as the most important subject apart from Math which she also doesn’t get any help for. Sometimes I wonder if I should spend some time helping her or if I should get her a tutor??? Then I think, she’s not even 8, for goodness sake!
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Chill mum, chill. Like you said, she’s not only 8. Her writing is good by my *ahem* high standards (afterall, I did English as a subject even at university). She gave the characters personality and as a reader, I could almost imagine the scene and smell too. Good job, Tessa – please send my message through.
She is very good! I think if you mark kids’ english papers generally especially in public schools, you will know that T1 is damn good already. Heck i know adults from London that don’t write as well as T1 now even. 🙂
Well done T1!