Why do people do it? It makes my skin wither and crawl with vomit.

I need to understand why people do it. Because if I don’t, I’ll end up bed-ridden with self-mutating lepracy cells.

On rare occasions, we dine with what some people perceive to be elitists. On these occasions, we get first class service to the point of embarrasment because we’d be asked a million times over if we really don’t need to have our shoe laces ironed, our forks polished every 2 minutes, or our bum tissues folded for us. It is irritating, fake and puke inducing.

Puh-leeze………cut me the bullshit.

Today, we had lunch with a supposed VIP (very interesting pig), except that the staff who served us didn’t know what it was. It didn’t help that it was dressed simple. Stupid pig. It could have at least adorned a leather waist coat. Service was below average, darn slow despite an empty restaurant. I could have sworn that I caught them playing the statue game. And we know how they absolutely lurvvvveee pigs here in Malaysia, especially those of the Very Interesting sort.

When we asked for 3 glasses of cold water, the Malay cheongsam’d waitress brought us 8 glasses of warm water. When we asked her why the water was warm when we asked for cold water, she pointed to one of us and said SHE asked for warm water. Tsk, tsk…….so young……so naive…….

So we told her that WE wanted COLD water. She obviously didn’t hear us the first time because she had to ask us again how many glasses of cold water we needed.

From her look of annoyance, we asked her if it was a problem getting cold water and she said that the restaurant didn’t have cold water. So we asked if they had ice? Negative. How can a Chinese restaurant in a hotel NOT have ice? Then she explained that they had ice……except that she had to walk all the way over to another section of the hotel, namely the Banquet Hall?, to collect the ice.

So we asked, “Can’t you call them and get somebody to deliver it here?”

Negative. She then quickly asked if we would really like some ice and received from us a kind Oh don’t worry if it’s too difficult. I mean, despite only a handful of tables that are occupied, we do see that they are keeping you on your toes. This pig can wait. He prefers drinking shit anyway.

Later, when the Captain of the restaurant came by, we asked her why it was that their restaurant didn’t have ice??? She looked shocked and said that they DID have ice.

She’s teasing us, right?

We explained how the other girl told us they didn’t have ice. She got us our cold water immediately.

Then the tim sum was sooooooooooooooooo slow. How long does it take to steam some tim sum? Oh, maybe they were using distilled steam. Tee was wailing that she was starving and went up to 2 separate waitresses to ask for food. They couldn’t offer her anything and dismissed her. I asked them if they had ANYTHING – nuts, milk, white rice, a carrot, anything. Anything to shut an over-dramatic toddler from fainting from starvation. They didn’t have white rice??? Surely, that bitch (oops, I meant dog) deserved to have a smelly sock rolled and shoved into her mouth.

“Sorry, we don’t have anything. Your food is coming soon.”

Well, YOU try explaining that to a hungry, exhausted from swimming toddler, who’s been on the high chair waiting for the last 40 minutes!!! Have you ever swum backstroke underwater???

When the pig miraculously wrote and signed it’s name on the bill, suddenly goats and donkeys crept out of the curtains and filled our room. Did we want dessert? Are we sure we didn’t want dessert? They’d give us FREE dessert. What about mooncake? Does the child like mooncake? Oh, what an absolutely delightful adorable little girl she is! Here, have some mooncake. At the expense of sounding rude, can I wipe your butt, sir? Or smell your fart?

After signing the bill, the pig trotted straight to the GM at front desk and told him to get their restaurant sorted. A thousand apologies followed. Brings back memories of Mind Your Language, doesn’t it?

Someone said that perhaps the Hotel should have trained their staff to recognise their higher bosses in order to prevent such unpleasantries. Well, that someone was a real stupid cow because hello???!!! Staff should be offering first class service to ANYONE and EVERYONE. If your job is to serve, you serve. The customer is always right. And even when he isn’t, you make him feel he is. You don’t just serve and be nice to a Datuk, a Tan Sri, a VIP or your own boss.

So yeah, I had a real good time having lunch with a whole bunch of farm animals today.

Cluck, cluck, cluck.

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Who is Mamapumpkin?
Mamapumpkin is a former Design Architect turned Multi-Million Dollar Digital Entrepreneur. She sets out to prove to all that you can have anything and everything that you want; if you have that fire of desire burning within and the drive to work hard. Even better with much love.

Mamapumpkin has not only grown corporate businesses successfully in the past and doubled her salary 5 times over 5 organisations but has grown THREE BUSINESSES to 7 FIGURES within an 8 year period. She now shows others EXACTLY HOW after retiring her own husband from employment. He is now the official dog walker, family driver, chef and THE BEST FATHER to their two girls and THE BEST HUSBAND to the woman who CHOSE HIM!

Mamapumpkin is the girl who has nothing but fights for everything including YOU. She is idealistic in her desire to put unbelievable amounts of money and extrardinary happiness into the lives of good people so we can change the world together believing in happiness for ALL. She strives to impact lives authentically wanting to reduce poverty cycles and enable quality education for all and always supports the voiceless. She believes we can all have a life of our own desires to enable real contribution into the world. But first, one needs to understand what this all means.

A beautiful life without limits.

If you wish to learn how to propel your life forward guaranteed, be brave to take action. Mamapumpkin's purpose is to build people. Her gift is to help them UNCOVER their HIDDEN GIFTS. She operates fairly and always leaves an impression. You either love her or not and she is alright either way.

She is a living testimony that women really can have a lot. Being financially and time free has enabled her to travel the world anytime, anywhere, doing anything with anyone, as she spends most of her days with her children, having fun, supporting others wherever she can. Also having fun.