I have that by my bedside tonight. And I intend to finish reading it by tomorrow morning. No kidding.

Today, I had one of those days. Yes, THOSE days. Those where you want to drive your car over a ditch at 200km/hr with both kids unbelted and warn them of the thrills ahead so you can all shout together, WHEEEEEEEEE!!!!!!!!! Then crash. Splat. Morbid. OK, I’ll take another approach. How about if I lined up the rest of the world and bludgeoned them not to death but till they beg for mercy. Gosh, I am feeling rather evil today, aren’t I?

Well, you would too if your baby woke up a minimum of 3 times a night, roughly at 1am, 3am and 6am every morning and wails for the boob. Then all day she doesn’t want to nap (AT ALL) and if at all, then it’s a maximum of 2 hours on a good day which happens once a week at best. And wait, there’s more. She doesn’t want to eat either. She is already grossly underweight and the Doctors are worried that she is not gaining. Being a small baby is fine but not gaining weight is not. Tell me, how is this not stressful? She’s barely touching the 3rd percentile on a breastfed baby chart, for goodness sake! My poor baby……is only 6.5 kilos. She has put on less than a kilo since she was 4.5 months old. She is now on her 9th month. Worrying sick does not even begin to describe my state of mind. She isn’t sleeping, she isn’t eating, so of course, she’s not growing. But what the fuck am I supposed to do about it?!! Force feed her? I don’t know how!

We took our first step into investigative procedures which was to test a stool sample to ensure she wasn’t passing out all the fat that she was eating. The test came back negative, which was great but it leaves us still with the worry of what then is causing her not to gain normally. The Doctor has requested for blood work to be done next. And I just can’t bear the thought of that.

In all other aspects, T2 is developing normally as far as I can see. She can sit independently, rolls all over the place confidently, doesn’t have a single tooth and can only crawl backwards which frustrates her to no end when she’s wanting to move forward. She can wave hello and goodbye and knows instinctively what comes next in sequence to regular activities. She babbles when she’s in the mood, scolds when she’s pissed and laughs when the jokes are really funny. She gets hyperventilatingly excited whenever the boob comes close to her face and knows who is who. So yeah, all in all, pretty normal.

To top this off, I have a preschooler whom I have to keep up with and a husband who keeps nagging me about my ‘habits’ on a daily basis. There is piles of laundry, ironing, the home is so dusty that I am getting major sinus attacks, I am struggling to keep my kids alive with my half-assed scrambled cooking and, and, and, and…..I just don’t know where to start with anything. What I consider my support system has an easy solution – get a maid. But that is not what we want to do. So what do we do?!

Today, I felt like crying. I felt like picking up the phone to cry to a best friend. To just lament about my sad current state of affairs. To get some sympathy because boy, do I need it! But I quickly realised that I do not HAVE a best friend. And I did not even have anyone to call!!! Who would I have called? I have no fucking clue.

So after picking Tee up from school with screaming baby in tow (I have T2 screaming with me in the car everyday because the time I pick Tee up is exactly when T2 would want to eat or sleep or have a poo, and I have tried all combinations  and avenues to solve this little problem, but she still insists on being fussy at exactly TWO PEE AM!!!). Where was I? Oh, after picking Tee up….I didn’t want to face a home that didn’t even make me feel like I was going home anymore. So I drove around town aimlessly, ran a few errands, tried to feed T2 her lunch in a parking lot and eventually parked myself at Moms. I would have burst out in tears but I was too proud. Because she, of all people, would have been the first to say I told you so or tell me to get a maid.

Nevertheless, she helped me take care of Tee AND T2. Took care of dinner. Fed the kids. Bathed the kids. Played with the kids. She even offered to come to my home to clean it for me as she knew how bad I was with housework. It is rather strange…..Mom is really, REALLY good at housework. She’s the type who does things very fast, super efficient, yet you wouldn’t find a millimeter of grime around your sink ring because she would have scrubbed it off with a toothbrush. She cannot stand the tiniest, baby crease on a made bed. And a table must be set to perfection. Shirts are ironed fast but without defect. Smooth as paper. Yet, she never taught her own daughter how to do good housework. I am really crap at it.

What can I say?

That’s the thing with Moms. Nothing needs to be said sometimes. They just know. They just KNOW when their daughters are feeling a little low. Hey, that rhymes. *bows*

I hope I know my girls as well as Mom knows me one day.

Thank you, Mama. Thank you from the bottom of my very heavy cellulite infested large body. I love you SO MUCH.

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Who is Mamapumpkin?
Mamapumpkin is a former Design Architect turned Multi-Million Dollar Digital Entrepreneur. She sets out to prove to all that you can have anything and everything that you want; if you have that fire of desire burning within and the drive to work hard. Even better with much love.

Mamapumpkin has not only grown corporate businesses successfully in the past and doubled her salary 5 times over 5 organisations but has grown THREE BUSINESSES to 7 FIGURES within an 8 year period. She now shows others EXACTLY HOW after retiring her own husband from employment. He is now the official dog walker, family driver, chef and THE BEST FATHER to their two girls and THE BEST HUSBAND to the woman who CHOSE HIM!

Mamapumpkin is the girl who has nothing but fights for everything including YOU. She is idealistic in her desire to put unbelievable amounts of money and extrardinary happiness into the lives of good people so we can change the world together believing in happiness for ALL. She strives to impact lives authentically wanting to reduce poverty cycles and enable quality education for all and always supports the voiceless. She believes we can all have a life of our own desires to enable real contribution into the world. But first, one needs to understand what this all means.

A beautiful life without limits.

If you wish to learn how to propel your life forward guaranteed, be brave to take action. Mamapumpkin's purpose is to build people. Her gift is to help them UNCOVER their HIDDEN GIFTS. She operates fairly and always leaves an impression. You either love her or not and she is alright either way.

She is a living testimony that women really can have a lot. Being financially and time free has enabled her to travel the world anytime, anywhere, doing anything with anyone, as she spends most of her days with her children, having fun, supporting others wherever she can. Also having fun.