Once upon a time, she designed buildings and interiors of corporate offices and on the rare occasion, homes. Now, she cleans poop and is student of a patience management course. From the drawing board as a London Architect to the realities of Motherhood, she has certainly learned many lessons in humility. And then others.....
To succeed in the corporate world, first succeed with your kid as the happy boss. Seriously.
This blog is about Mamapumpkin: A crazy, demented Mom who cares full time, alone, without any help, for an even crazier preschooler AND a baby with a boob addiction problem.
She writes anything that comes out of her head, mostly without thinking first, which almost always gets her into trouble (according to her husband, whom she considers the love of her life.......on a good day).
Her 2 pet monkeys drive her towards challenge after challenge, 24/7. Day after Day.....and by the way, her parents are Muslim, her in-laws Buddhist, she's Catholic and her Hubs, an Atheist. She's thinking her kids should be Hindu, just to complete the rainbow religion cycle.
Gotta love it.
She'd love to hear from you : Mamapumpkin at gmail dot com
T2 has become increasingly manipulative. She knows how to get what she wants ALL THE TIME. Here she is smiling secretly when we were out at Wendy’s one day because she got her Daddy to walk her around and around and around till all the customers heads started gossiping about that poor abused man. (I could see daggering eyes of jealousy whilst women watched me dig into my Mr Frosty. If only their husbands would do the repetitious merry go round dance with their own kids in public).
Daddy’s face was naturally black as night so I’ve whitened it out. Tee, hee!
On the night that T2 wanted the boob like forever, I tried pushing gently an Avent pacifier into her mouth and she vomitted.
*GUILTY*
It was the smallest sized pacifier we could find but it is still too big for her tiny mouth. She keeps refusing it nevertheless. She tells me, “Don’t try giving me Kandos when I’ve tried Godiva, Mommy………..I know the difference.” (note to Aunty Trina and Uncle Ben, this post was written way before our Kandos/Godiva conversation – I must be psychic. Sometimes, I truly think I am….)
T2 has become a boobaholic and a sleep-in-armaholic. I’m not sure if having vices at such a young age is healthy but the experts claim so. You must always respond to your babies cries. You are not spoiling them. Babies cannot be spoiled. Babies will grow up into confident and more successful adults as a result.
It’s all hogwash to me. Yet I do respond to my baby’s cries ALL THE TIME and I do allow her her little addictions. But only because I love her SO, SO, SO MUCH!!!
Look at the little bugger. She’s always frowning at the camera, never a smile. Yet smiles when she gets to make us suckers for her addictions.
T2 has been having a habit of crying blue murder two nights in a row (so far!). This only happens at night anywhere between 1am to 4am. Does she have colic? Is she seeing ghosts? Has she got a tummy ache? Does she want to sleep with the nipple in her mouth? Does she want to sleep on me? Does she transform into the devil? I don’t know. All I know is nothing works and she just keeps crying…….
Tee crying at 2 weeks old. Wasn’t she skinny then? She now has a triple chin at 7 weeks old
These are some of the reasons why babies cry:
* Baby is wet
* Baby is hungry
* Baby is bored or lonely
* Baby needs attention
* Baby has had too much attention
* Baby is in pain
* Baby is tired
* Baby is waking up
* Baby needs to poo or wee
* Baby is uncomfortable (too hot, too cold, too constricted)
My first Tiffany gem was a gift on my wedding day. I was 28 years old. That is TWENTY EIGHT years old, not sweet sixteen, not twenty one and certainly not one day old. It was from the Hubs’s best man from New York.
Tee’s first Tiffany gem was when she was 1 year old. Can you believe it? ONE YEAR OLD!!! A gift from her Godfather here in KL.
Now, T2 on the day she was BORN, she already has a Tiffany necklace from my cousins in Australia. Aren’t we spoiling these kids a bit much here!!
Subsequently, I bought myself 2 pairs of Tiffany earrings when I was working at KLCC and could afford it but have since decided that I don’t like Tiffany’s because silver gets tarnished and you need to polish it frequently. I’d much rather someone bought me some Cartier jewellery – that’s a BIG hint….…hint, hint….hint, hint……take the hint, dammit!
I was so sure that this time round, there was no sign of post-natal blues as I felt extremely in control despite all the minor irritations that the CLM had caused. I was able to look beyond and take deep breathes, tell myself this too shall pass…..On hindsight, the CLM wasn’t so bad. She somewhat respected my wishes, like when I told her not to feed the baby any water (washing the mouth is OK, feeding water to drink or remove hiccups is not). It would have been nice if she had been more attentive to baby’s butt because now that she’s no longer here, baby does not have a single rash on her precious behind and I’m not even using any diaper rash cream. Her bum is as smooth as her face skin, all because Mama takes good care of it. With tender love. When CLM was here, we had to use diaper rash cream every day because baby kept sleeping in wet nappies!
Alas, I cried several times the night before T2′s full moon party. Loud, heavy sobs of anguish……till Tee came to comfort me when she was really supposed to be asleep. The Hubs stroked my hair whilst Tee held my hand. We were all helpless.
It was not post-natal blues though. It was because of incredible stress!!!
SHE must be the most stubborn lady that I have ever met. No wonder the Hubs and Tee and T2 are bloody, seriously, weight on tits touching the floor kind of stubborn. They beat me hands down. Seriously. I am known to be strong willed but you’d have to move the Earth to have them admit to something they don’t want to.
“She may be wet.”
“No, she’s not wet.”
“How do you know? You haven’t checked?”
She pats the baby’s bum from outside the swaddle amidst another layer of a plastic panty AND a nappy and a nappy liner…..how one feels for a wet nappy outside all those layers is beyond me.
“No, she’s not wet.”
“Why don’t you put her down and open up the swaddle, then you can feel if she’s wet or not?”
“No, she’s not wet.”
“She won’t fuss if she’s not wet or poo-poo’d”
“No, she’s not wet. She just wants to sleep.”
GIVE UP.
I eventually go to check T2′s nappy. It is wetter than Niagara Falls.
“What’s in this chocolate?” she asks of our chocolate fondue mix.
“It’s just melted chocolate.”
“It can’t be. Melted chocolate isn’t this soft and light.”
“It is. My Mom said she was going to make the chocolate fondue from melted chocolate….”
“Your Mom must’ve mixed the chocolate mixture with egg white to get that light chocolate mousse texture.”
“I don’t think so. She didn’t mention any eggs at all. I’ve done it before, melt chocolate….it was soft just like that!”
“No, she definitely put some egg white.”
“No, NO egg white. Trust me, my Mom wouldn’t have gone through the trouble to whisk some egg white into chocolate. Besides, eating raw egg is not her style.”
“There is definitely egg white in the chocolate.”
“Maybe the chocolate you’ve melted before was of a different brand and it didn’t turn out soft but this IS melted chocolate. I’ve done it before!”
“No, there is definitely egg white in the chocolate. Plain melted chocolate is not like that.”
“OK, I’ll ask my Mom right now, OK? I’m sure there is no egg white.”
“Surely there is egg inside……”
GIVE UP.
Sms’d Mom to enquire about chocolate fondue recipe. Answer came back – NO EGG WHITE. Did I rub it in? No.
“How come she’s always poo-ing?”
“Because breastfed babies poo all the time. Like after every feed.”
“Why is she always hungry? She’s not getting enough to eat.”
“Sometimes she just wants to suckle, she’s not really eating.”
“She’s not getting enough milk. She is always hungry. See?”
“If she wasn’t getting enough, she wouldn’t be poo-ing 8 times a day and having so many wet nappies!”
“She is always hungry. Look. Again! She still wants to eat!”
“She usually gets hungry after a poo. Sometimes she just wants to suckle to go to sleep.”
“She is always hungry. You don’t have enough milk. She is hungry!! She wants some more…see? See? She is hungry!”
*my heart rate and blood pressure starts rising to uncontrollable levels*
“She is NOT hungry. She just wants to suck.”
“No, she is hungry! See? She wants to eat. You don’t have enough milk. She hasn’t eaten enough. She is hungry.”
“If she is not eating enough, she wouldn’t have put on 1 kilo in the last 3 weeks!!!! Trust me, she’s not hungry!!!”
“She doesn’t have enough. She is hungry.”
GIVE UP.
*STABBED MYSELF AFTER CRYING BUCKETS*
So there you go.
If there is one thing worse than a confinement lady monster, it’s a fucking MONSTER-IN-LAW. Who stayed with us for five long days. I have never minded her but this particular visit was met with much hostility. All she wanted to do was carry the baby all day long walking and rocking, which is fine by me but when she doesn’t even know how to carry a baby properly (because all her babies were attended to by Amahs) and the baby is uncomfortable, give it a rest!
And have you ever had someone stare at your boob so much in your life? Not even the Hubs, my very own SEX PARTNER, has paid so much attention to my boobs. Ever. She followed T2 everywhere she went, which meant she also watched T2 suck on my breast, at close range, every single time. You know, just to prove that I didn’t have enough milk. How rude! It was really uncomfortable for me having her stare at my NIPPLE and how it didn’t produce enough milk for her precious grandchild. It was like her carrying a magnifying glass holding it against my CLITORIS!!!
I’ve been searching all of the internet and cannot seem to find a satisfactory enough answer apart from that it is the celebration of a newborn’s coming of age, one month old, to be exact. I wish it were more romantic, that there were dreamy aged old traditional stories weaved into a baby’s full moon, but nay. But if you do have one, please do share it with me.
All I know is that on a baby’s full moon, you need to have nasi kunyit (yellow turmeric glutinous rice) and curry, red eggs and angku cakes. And they all signify good luck in some form or other *yawn*.
Anyway, T2 has had her full moon party. It was a small family affair which saw her RM6,000 richer (majority from grandparents). Booya! She’s richer than me!!! How come our parents don’t give US (meaning the Hubs and I) such ‘ang pows’? She was also passed around like a game of pass the parcel, poor child. She was so terorrised and horrified although too polite to show it. She’s a real dainty young lady, I’m telling you…….gracious as hell. How unlike her Mama and her Che-Che, who would just tell it like it is, even if it was how you had some green booger hanging out of your right nostril.
I couldn’t stand the fact that so many dirty hands touched T2, people should really get educated on getting their hands washed first if they needed to touch someone elses newborn. OK, ok….she’s no longer a newborn. She’s ONE MONTH OLD. There, I’ve said it. I’m still in denial though. Has it been that long?
So what did we do on the first day after her full moon? We went out ALL DAY from 10am to 10pm. YUP!!!! We discovered that T2 loves the car ride. She was quiet for a whole hour in the car. Now we know her weakness *rubs hands together*
Look at my precious angel – do you think she deserves to suffer from oral thrush? What is that? It is when your newborn has little white polka dots all over her mouth inside, on the inside cheeks, on the tongue, on the inner lips…….
One day, I noticed 2 white spots on T2′s tongue. I quickly asked CLM what they were and she said not to worry, it is just milk. I wondered why milk would be curdled into little dots but I didn’t question her, she is the expert after all.
The next day, T2′s mouth had more white polka dots and again, I felt that something was amiss. I asked the CLM again what was wrong with my milk when it was sticking all over T2′s mouth. She brought out her glasses to look and freaked out. She said she had never seen such a thing before and that I should see the Doctor immediately.
That made ME panic and so I called the Doctor whose nurse said it sounded like oral thrush. They advised me to wash her mouth with some water to see if it went away and if it didn’t, then most likely it was oral thrush. I had no idea what that was but was going to wait till the next day to bring T2 to the Doctor as it was already 3.45pm and the Doctor closed at 4.30pm.
But the CLM was completely freaking out insisting that I needed to bring the baby to the Doctor immediately so I quickly called again to tell them we were making a dash to the hospital and a dash to the hospital we did. Just me and the Hubs.
It turns out T2 did have oral thrush and the Doctor said it was due to poor hygiene and asked if my CLM put her fingers into baby’s mouth. I said I had no idea as I wasn’t with the baby 24/7 and knowing how CLM doesn’t obey me, it is possible.
To cut a long story short, the Doctor prescribed some Daktarin to rub into baby’s mouth and my nipples or otherwise we would be passing it to each other and we returned home 3 hours later.
If your baby has oral thrush, get some Daktarin, wash your hands thoroughly and dry it with a paper towel. Make sure your nails are super short and rub the gel with your pinky all over your newborn’s mouth inside. Wash your hands again and rub the gel onto your nipples. It should clear within a few days. But experts say that you should continue treating yourself and baby at least a week after the thrush clears and in the meantime, to not wash your towels (or whatever comes into contact with your breasts) with other clothes as cross contamination can occur.You should also wash your towels in boiling hot water and change it regularly.
Wear disposable breast pads until a week after the thrush clears. If you don’t have them, then you should also wash your bras in boiling hot water. When you have thrush, your breasts will feel a sharp knife jabbing like pain cutting within it every now and then, maybe a few times a day, and usually after a feed.
Sometimes, when a baby has oral thrush, she may also have some rash around the anus hole. In that case, check with your Doctor what you need in order to treat it. And as much as possible, keep your nipples and baby’s butt exposed to air.
That’s what I’ve been doing all day. BECAUSE!!!!!!!!! CLM left last night but MIL is in town so I’m just getting ready. Getting ready to paint the town pink with T2, ready to meet all our friends, ready to jet set to all the places Mommy wants to haunt, ready to EATTTTTTTT………..what the hell I want to eat!!!!!!
The moment MIL steps onto her plane back to Kota Bharu, I’m off. With wings.
Unfortunately, I have never used a baby sling even though I now have 4 slings and 3 upright baby carriers. Tee was carried in a baby bjorn but T2 is still too small for a baby bjorn so I’ll need to master the art of wearing the sling. I tried it a few times today but she cried. I’ve youtubed it now and can’t wait to try again but MIL refuses to let me touch the baby because she is asleep. Whose baby is this anyway?
When CLM came, she came to do us a favour as she is a relative. But now that the baby is a month old, we have put aside some money for her ang pow. How much shall we give her? The Hubs says RM3,800 but I think that’s too much because she hardly did much (to me anyway). She cooked for me and the family (or rather instructed my helper most of the time), which is a plus point, because she fed me really well. I have sufficient milk for the baby and I owe it to her cooking. She did not take care of the baby at all during the night, which I hear CLM’s are supposed to do? She cleaned the diaper half the time during the day (I cleaned it the other half of the day) and rocked and carried the baby everyday to sleep. Oh, and she bathed the baby once every 2-3 days because it was always too cold. That is the extent of her work here. So what do you think she is worth? I hear the market rate is RM3,000 to RM4,000 – care to share?
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