Looking Back……

Today is Merdeka. 

When my late Mom was around, Merdeka was a tradition for us. It started out with us always, ALWAYS spending the night in town at a hotel with a view of the fireworks, and even joining the crowd at night to celebrate just for the heck of it. We did it before T1 was born right up till T2 was born, until traffic during Merdeka night was so bad that we decided that we no longer wanted to get out into town but staying at a hotel was still an option. Just for fun. We are hotel junkies thanks to Mom. Mom spent a lot of time bringing us to hotels. We ate a lot at hotels and all her meetings with friends were at hotels. 

This year, for Merdeka, we are still at a hotel, but not in Malaysia. This year, 2017, is also the first time ever that the thought crossed my mind about migration. We actually started looking. London, Perth, Singapore, America…..I feel so sad about it. I don’t want to leave Malaysia and in actual fact, since we have been traveling so much, we can really go wherever we want to go whenever we want to go to appreciate life in other places. But the kids future is at stake. What will be their future? 

In our travels, the kids have been exposed to various ways of life and they can see for themselves what different countries have to offer because we don’t just do touristy stuff but hang out with the locals and really do what the locals do for a good month at least. So they know.  But when you leave your Tanah Air Ku, that’s like chopping off a piece of yourself even if I have a Singaporean birth certificate. 

I am sad. It has been a challenging 2 years but with it has also come many blessings. So as yet, we are still undecided. And because of that, we are renovating our home currently because no concrete future plans have been made and we have not purchased our dream home near the school because we do not know yet if we are staying or moving. My kids are happy at school here but society has not allowed them the best that they could possibly have. 

When I was a kid, I grew up in a bungalow in Cheras on a hill and on that hill, my late grandmother who lived 3 doors away, knew practically the whole street. This allowed us, the kids, to roam freely up and down the entire street of Jalan Selasih to visit our friend’s homes and we were always welcomed. Likewise, my home that my Dad named the Gabriel Hotel, was open to our friends, many of whom came to even live with us for extended periods of time. My late Mom herself had offered free board to any of her friends who were homeless or had left their husbands temporarily or anyone who did not have a place to stay. I only followed by example and invited an orphan to live with us for a year. When I think back, how surreal that was and now I have no idea where she has gone! I had so many lovely childhood memories in Jalan Selasih and wish I had kept in better touch with all the neighbourhood kids I grew up with. There was also Garden International School up the road so we had many friends come visit us after school. It was FUN!!! Playtime was every single day!!! Not a day passed without us playing together and we never studied. My parents never forced us to study and seriously, studying was not a priority in that day and age unlike now, my poor kids. Even as a parent who does not push them to study, their environment challenges them to do it. Values are different now. My kids fun times are mostly with the family and with their friends at school as no way are they allowed to roam around freely or even hang out with random friends that we do not know well. Until I know their friends parents really well, I am not about to leave my kids with someone else because the world just isn’t safe like it used to be. Many irresponsible parents around yo. 

I am always thinking how far I have come and wonder if my kids will ever get the richness of life that I had. I want the best for them so that in any circumstance, they have the same if not better resilience than me to not just survive but to excel on an international playing field. What does a kid need in order to fuel them up for success and happiness? Because their happiness and ability to sustain themselves and give back to others less fortunate is ultimately the most important thing to me. If they as adults can do that, my most important job is done. T1 turns 13, a real teenager in 2 weeks. Already she’s had quite a life. It hasn’t always been perfect since she lost 2 grandmothers whom she was extremely close to just like that and now has to worry about losing me too. It’s just not fair on her. But right now, I have so many challenges being thrown at me for whatever reason, friends whom I really believed were friends betrayed me in the highest order, the people whom I have helped so much in the past turned against me and then we have people who have their own perceptions of me based purely from rumours, I ask myself, have I really hurt anyone to deserve all this? Why can’t the people who are not happy with me just FACE UP TO ME to tell me what I have done or not done instead of quietly going behind my back to cause hurt. The truth is, I’ve probably not done what they wished me to do, perhaps jealousy for some, because if I have truly done wrong, then be a sincere friend with enough balls to come tell me. Name one person who’s done it. There is none. Obviously none of them were real to begin with! 

On the flip side, I am extremely honest and vocal with people who have done ME wrong and have no qualms telling the world what the facts are. And in front of them too. But I guess not everyone is like me. My mom trained me well to be true to self and act on the highest integrity so I know no other way. Not everyone had an amazing Mom like me so perhaps I cannot fault them. But people can learn right??? 

I’ve had friends who had zero parents or not raised by their own parents who are very good people. They had no guidance, yet used their own internal moral compass to always do the right thing. 

This brings us back to the people of Malaysia. With so many insecure and wayward folk performing laziness, cheating others because it is the only way they know how, what is our future in Malaysia going to be like? How many years will it take to train these small minds that there is a better right way? Just today, I was at a bank in Singapore and the service I received from a plain counter girl called a teller, was 10 times improved from the general service that I would get in Malaysia. Several years ago when I was fighting for my Bumiputera status in Malaysia, I had to call the Singapore Government to retrieve my birth certificate from a random general line of their naturalisation department and within 5 minutes, not only did I get transferred to the correct person but got the answers I required. Try calling Putrajaya in Malaysia? Trust me, I have called Putrajaya for many, many reasons work and otherwise on more than several dozen occasions and I never, ever got the same service as I did Singapore. What went wrong? This is what my kids are exposed to. 

It is apparent even as an employer that people who have had more international exposure versus purely narrow minded kampung mentalities, that there is a gap. After running my own Multi-Level Marketing business for almost 3 years now, I see the same weakness in thought processes that I faced as a boss in the corporate sector. What can we do? Our society has come to such that the majority are only here to blame instead of taking full ownership. There are always excuses and you can have excuses for the rest of your life but if you want a real change, then you must first start from within. Yes? 

I am frustrated. I am frustrated that there are too few grounded parents raising kids with good values to serve our country and as a result, we have ended up with crap. A whole load of crap. I am generalising of course, because I do know of some very good people here. But if you were to put them with the masses, it is too few to change a nation. How would we change a selfish, greedy adult to be a better person? How? Because that very same selfish, greedy adult will only raise more selfish, greedy kids. 

When we have no more options, we resort to drastic actions like migration. Not that the grass is greener at all. But it is comforting to be in a place where justice is served, where there is no discrimination, and what you do really counts to making a difference. 

Is it just me? What more can we do about our beloved country Malaysia? I have worked hard. I have fought for truth and country. I have been a good citizen giving up a lot for others to progress. But Malaysia resists. Mahathir would have chosen to just lock up the bad guys and sometimes I feel he had no choice. People were just too stupid to see the reality of our journey together as a nation. He was not perfect but I understand where he came from. There is no easy solution. 

Truth is, I really want Malaysia to be home for my kids. I want Malaysia to be a nation of integrity. A nation we can truly be proud of, like Bhutan, for example. Where we never have to watch our backs for back stabbers, where we can trust others with our kids, where theft is not an issue because everyone knows how to do the right thing, where everyone is respectful of each other’s race, cast, social status, religion, sexual orientation. But I have failed to inspire everyone in my journey and I alone, really cannot do much more. 

I look back and this cheered me up, being selected as one of Asia’s Top Mom Blogs 6 years ago. I have also done my bit for the Children of Myanmar. I’ve built a successful MLM business giving hope to a lot of people. I’ve written for International publisher Conde Nast. I’ve been a selected contributor to several online mommy forums. I am the Malaysian Ambassador for an international traveling family service. I’ve changed a few lives for the better. I’ve been of service to moms during my stint at the Ibu Family Resource Group as a committee member. I’ve done my fair share of volunteer work with the Soroptimists. I’ve done well in my career and made tons of money for my previous employers. I have a husband who is 500% supportive and two wonderful girls who make me laugh like crazy every single day. I have a great life. What more do I want? 

I want you Malaysia to buck up. I want us RAKYAT MALAYSIA to look within ourselves to really ask ourselves what we want for our country. It all begins with us. If you can work with me in alignment, we have hope yet. I do not want to be the one who ran away. Look around you. What can you do to inspire those around you to do the right thing? See some rubbish? Pick it up. Just because it isn’t yours doesn’t mean you have to leave it for the road sweeper. Make someone smile every single day, even a stranger, make it a habit. Start a little community project, with your kids even, to work towards a better Malaysia. Get creative and build upon our truth for Malaysia. Look at Syed Azmi. He is out there doing something positive, yet gets a lot of slack for it, and I wonder why? Why is someone doing good getting so much crap!!?? It is because we have too many idiots running around. Let’s work together to inspire the minds of these idiots then. If there is a will, there is a way!! I’ve done it. I have changed a stalkers mind from stalking my family before. We can really do better for Malaysia. We just have to want to do it together. 

Education. Education. Education. 

Please be brave enough to challenge and stop causing more damage. Look within and seek help. What’s causing your distress? What have you done to get out of your struggle mode? 

Please, I am begging all of you Malaysians, let’s save Malaysia. 

Malaysia, tanah air ku……..

Who is Mamapumpkin?
Mamapumpkin spent 7 years in London committing crimes to gain her Bartlett BSc in Architecture. She spent 7 years as a Stay At Home Mom raising her children as documented in this Mamapumpkin blog since over 10 years ago and thereafter returned to the Corporate World stronger than ever. Her last job as Country Director of a British Railway Signalling organisation saw her getting ill with an aortal and mitral heart valve regurgitation and early stage cancer. Through her journey from working to not working to working again, she sets out to prove to all women that they can do anything and everything that they set out to do; as long as they have that fire of desire burning within and the drive to work hard. Even better with oodles of love, passion and integrity.

Despite being ill, she has grown a network marketing business from very little knowledge and experience in the otherwise infamously known MLM (Multi-Level Marketing) industry, racing from an income of ZERO to RM 100,000 monthly in merely 2 years. She is a firm believer of the MLM business model but realises the pitfalls too and understands how and why the majority of people would shy away (or zoom far away) from any MLM business.

She is now pondering the title of her new book, From Zero to 100,000 RM monthly in 2 years and has a sequel in the pipeline with the aim of helping real professionals succeed in the World of MLM. Always the giver, Mamapumpkin has supported orphans for over 30 years and has now extended her care to the sick, single mothers, and even struggling families. She believes that with the MLM business model, we can all have a life of our own desires to enable real contribution into the world.

A beautiful life without limits.

Mamapumpkin currently manages the Homeschooling Hub Malaysia on Facebook. She also runs Working Women Malaysia (not THAT kind of Working Women!), Mamapumpkin - Creating A Life of Abundance, and Funky Moms on Facebook to offer REAL support to all women who want career and life success. She is a living testimony that women really can have a lot. Being financially free has enabled her to travel the world anytime anywhere doing anything, and she spends most of her day to day with her children, reading and supporting other women.

For enquiries, please contact her at mamapumpkin at gmail dot com or WhatsApp her at +6012-2333840
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