Embarrassing moments of armpits and groins

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Embarrassing moments of armpits and groins

By bigpumpkin | April 22, 2007

I was told this was a true story of an Australian Mother.

She has three kids under five and is busy as hell. One evening, she is just too bloody exhausted for her daily shower and sinks into bed without even brushing her teeth. After a great nights sleep, she bounces out of bed LATE the next morning, in taking her kids to school and then rushes to an appointment with her gynaecologist. But before that, she rushes home just to have a quick wash of her private parts. In her haste, she uses the first bath sponge at her nearest reach and is out the door feeling more confident. There is just nothing like having bad breath when you visit your dentist. The same goes when you visit your gynae. At the gynae, the Doctor inspects her legs wide open, pauses. Then takes a closer look and sums it up, “So we’ve gone the extra mile today, huh? You have the all clear. I’ll see you next year.”

Feeling relieved that she had made the extra effort to go home to wash before seeing the gynae, she made her way to pick the kids up. While preparing lunch, her three year old asks, “Mom, have you seen my paint sponge?”

“What paint sponge?”

“The one I use for my glitter glue…I can’t find it”

Mother goes with three year old to look for paint sponge. Negative.

Later that evening, when she is about to have her actual shower, she notices her daughter’s paint sponge. She picks it up and turns it over and sure enough, it was drowned with silver dust.

Slowly remembering that she had used that same sponge earlier this morning to wash her vagina, she sprung out of the shower in search for her compact mirror and AAAAKKKK!!!!

Her vagina looked like a sparkly silver decorated Christmas Tree!! She went through the Yellow Pages in search for a new gynaecologist that very day.

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As far as I can remember, I have always used talcum powder on my body after a shower. It’s just a life long habit that has made me feel more silky, more fresh. I use it on all my joints, including my underarms. For those of you who do this, you may know what happens when there is too much powder mixed with sweat. Not a pretty sight.

So imagine my embarrasment when a friend asked in horror as though thoroughly concerned for my well-being when she accidentally caught a glimpse of my armpits during a group lunch, “Oh My God, what is THAT on your armpits???!!!”

It sure freaked me out. I immediately looked without being discreet and almost died of shame when I saw the white clumps of powder pattern lacing my foldy fat underarms.

“Oh, it’s just powder, haha…” and changed the subject with the speed of light.

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