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Silly Mummy
By bigpumpkin | September 15, 2006
As usual, Tee and I rushed out for her baby dance class every Thursday morning. We’re always zipping everywhere. Why can’t there ever be a day when we move slowly, talk calmly and are not……err……..rushing. The phrases ‘always in haste’ and ’scramble like a headless chicken’ are synonymous with my life ever since Tee entered.
So after her baby dance class, 2 well coiffed moms of her classmates, invited us for some gorgeous Indian food down at the tiny, quaint restaurant nearby. Nevermind that I’d already ordered Tee’s lunch before hand at the baby dance class cafe. Nevermind that Tee was famished after her dance class and needed some quick feeding. Nevermind that I was dressed like Wonderwoman meets Godzilla to walk into an actual restaurant. We said, “YES, we’d love to join you!”
With 3 antsy ravenous toddlers at the restaurant, we finally settled down with our bags, strollers, umbrellas and more bags, to look at the menu.
But wait. The other 2 moms reached into their bags and brought out baby food. They brought food for their toddlers? Wow….so organised, I thought to myself. So I quickly glanced back at my menu to find something ‘child friendly’ enough at an Indian restaurant for Tee while she whined hungrily that she wanted the food of the other toddlers.
After a few times telling her to be patient (I don’t know why i keep doing that knowing full well that it NEVER achieves anything), while reading the menu AND restraining her at her high chair from attempting to crawl across the table to jump into their baby food with crystal wine glasses and drink as obstacles, I finally managed to order.
Thankfully, the moms offered Tee a nugget and a carrot to tie her over. What they must be thinking. Tsk tsk.
By the time the food arrived (Hallelujah!), I felt the weight of the Pyramids of Egypt evaporating off my shoulders. With me octotasking (that’s multi-tasking like an octopus, folks) and talking with my brain shooting at various tangents (to the waiter, to my toddler, to the moms, to the floor, to my toddler again, to the moms, to the waiter, to the spoon, to another toddler, to the neighbouring table, to my toddler again) at the speed of light (OK, I exaggerate), it honestly felt like releasing your piss in a clean confined toilet cubicle with soft tissues and clean shelves after holding it hard for an hour in traffic.
Then.
The moms bring out their toddler drinks. They cannot be toddler drinks in plain sippy cups or boring tumblers. No, of course not! These are toddlers we’re talking about here.
“I want that one!!!” Tee yells and points to the yellow Mickey Mouse eared bottle. Gosh, here we go again.
“I want orange juice, that one!”
“No, that isn’t yours. Here drink your water from this magic glass.”
“No!!! I want that one!!” with flailing arms in the air, that spurred me to remove everything within one foot of her immediate surroundings. By this time, people in the very small restaurant had started noticing us. Actually, they probably noticed much earlier, just I didn’t notice them noticing.
Then. Yes, then….
The perfectly organised Stepfordian moms brought out an ironed bib each and gently attached it around their calm toddlers necks slow motion. Tee suddenly went silent. Silent??? Silence!!!
Her eyes darted towards mine.
“Mummy, where Tessa’s bib? Where? Tessa’s bib? Go where?” with accompanying hand actions (too cute).
Well obviously in our rush out, Mummy had forgotten sippy cup, food bib and never even considered preparing emergency food. Perhaps I should consider attending finishing school for moms.
“I’m sorry, honey. We don’t have a bip today. Shall we use a napkin instead?”
“Where? Where Tessa’s bip?”
“Mummy left it at home, Sweetie. Mummy forgot.”
“Silly Mummy!”
Now THAT was a shocker. She was 20 months old.
Topics: The Pumpkin life, Small Pumpkin, Simply Motherhood |
4 Responses to “Silly Mummy”
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September 15th, 2006 at 4:09 pm
ahhahahahahaha. so funny!! at 2 yo and she’s got peer pressure. moral is “dont hang out with stepfordian moms or prepare yrself in advance or just have a thick skin and enjoy yrself, who cares? as long as you both enjoy yrselves.
September 16th, 2006 at 10:22 am
ROTFL!! That was hillarious! Not easy to have thick skin as our kids dont & will want what the others have, sigh!
September 29th, 2006 at 6:23 am
THAT WAS HILARIOUS!!!!!!!!!!!!! I loved it. You can substitute Tessa for DJ’s name at any given time in that story. That’s how he behaves in restaurants too. (((hugs)))
p.s. LOL at==Wonderwoman meets Godzilla and Stepfordian moms! You are hilarious!
October 7th, 2008 at 4:13 pm
[…] she insisted on wearing a bib, accusing me again! of not bringing one. Well, I’ve got news for you, young Missy! You’re four YEARS old, […]